brodyblue's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- fuck. So I haven't written in this for almost a year so uh here it goes. Today was pretty much one of the most depressing days of my life. David found out that I had kissed another guy. He flipped out and started hitting himself and banging his head against a chair. It was all so goddamn dramatic. All the while I am crying my eyes out begging him to stop. I kissed that boy when David and I had broken up. But I know if it were the other way around I would have been pissed at him too. David is the only guy I have ever been with. I am 20 years old now. I love him, he's my first everything. But I can't help feeling like there is so much that I need to experience. He's been with 3 other girls besides me, and I've only kissed other guys. So our year and a half relationship is over. And I'm having different emotions come in waves. Like one moment I feel the need to cry and pick up the phone and call him. I just want to lay in bed feeling numb but then I have this urge to just get up,get out and do something. Right now I have that sad feeling. only time will tell. I guess that's all I can tell myself. But besides the boyfriend madness there has been so much going on. I'm working my ass off trying to save money to move away. I got in a fight yesterday at the river with some girl that was talking shit. I won. Just madness damnit. I'm never going out again. I'm just going to work my ass off and save up all of my money and leave as soon as possible. peace. 6:04 p.m. - 2007-06-17 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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